I’m so deeply behind on posting these reactions posts, but I guarantee the reactions are still fresh because I write them down in my notebook as I watch the episode. Writing this post will just be me reliving the episode with you through my notes. Should be fun!

This episode, we recovered from the flop-tastrophe from last week and into another week of the chefs all performing pretty well! We’ve got some awkward cross-promotion in the quick fire, Justin committing fashion crimes, and an elimination challenge brief that just doesn’t make any sense and seems to be judged wildly inconsistently. There’s also a major cooking disaster that the edit desperately tries to make us blame the chef for, but is so clearly not their fault that it comes off incredibly disingenuous. This week, drama is the main course.

Quick Fire

• Okay miss try-too-hard. Cheering for the guest judge like a teacher’s pet. Idk if you think you’re being clever but everyone can plainly see you’re sucking up.
• I wrote this in my notes: “‘Big Josh fan’ – girl same” but I have no idea what that was supposed to mean. But it feels important, so I’m leaving it in.
• They’re talking up Josh wines as if it’s this super exclusive, premium wine, which makes sense since they’re the sponsor for this episode. But my association with Josh wines is watching the same ad fifty billion times on Hulu and seeing it on the cheap end of the Safeway wine aisle, so something’s not matching up here.
• SNEEZE-GATE 🚨🚨🚨
• Dang, there’s a lot of money flowing this season. Can’t say the chefs don’t deserve it though, so I’m happy about it.
• How many different “ways” are there to do cheese? It’s just cheese!
• Eggs just don’t seem like a star ingredient to me. Idk how they’re going to make a stand-out dish with eggs. What are you going to do, fry it in truffle oil? Scramble it with a gold leaf?
• Justin looks like he’s either bored out of his mind or on the verge of falling asleep. Possibly both.
• Okay, the twins have been officially added to the hate-list. Not above Justin, but definitely in the “egregious” tier.
• MOCHI-GATE 🚨🚨🚨
• Soft scrambled eggs are just undercooked eggs. Fight me.
• I want to try Tomme cheese ☹️ It looks and sounds so delicious for some reason. Maybe I’m just hungry.
• “You just cook whatever you want and I will pair the wine to your food, instead of the other way around.” – So, the literal exact opposite of this challenge?
• Oof, these mochi balls are looking crusty af.
• Boo Justin, yay Jennifer

Elimination Challenge

• “There’s no catch” Kristen says, looking slyly at the camera. She’s in her villain era and the chefs know it lol
• I don’t understand this “make a side dish a main dish” nonsense. What even is the difference between a main dish an a side dish? The show never explains. Jonathan even said “you can’t just make a bigger plate of collard greens and throw a protein on it and call it a day” which is exactly what I would have done if given this challenge, but then nobody ever explains what you should do instead.
• CABBAGE-GATE 🚨🚨🚨 Where’s the brotherly love now, twins?!?
• What is this okra play? Seems unwise to me. Literally two of the judges have openly said they don’t like it. Why would you take that on, they’re literally giving you an out.
• It’s never easy on Top Chef. Of course you’re also serving an entire diner full of guests. For some reason.
• I must admit, I don’t understand the staggered service here. You get ninety minutes to cook for the judges, and then ninety more to cook for the rest of the restaurant? What’s the incentive to not phone it in for the restaurant cook? The judges have already tried your food, you’re not going to get docked points if your food tastes like crap to the rest of the diners. This one doesn’t make sense to me.
• Jonathan hates turkeys? HE’S A TURKEY RACIST??? He loses Thanksgiving privileges. Get him out of here.
• “Main Dish Energy” is very funny, ngl 😆
• “Maybe I can fool Tom into thinking he likes okra” – Stop. You can’t fool Tom. You’re embarrassing yourself.
• Did anyone else see Brittany just drop some greens on the grocery store floor, and then just pick them back up again and put them in her cart??? Where is my fainting couch, I think I caught the vapors.
• SHE’S NOT YOUR BABY?!?!?!?!?!?
• The little video messages between Sherry and her son are so sweet ❤️ Sometimes the “messages from home” segment can feel really forced and awkward, but these are really organic and really bring the viewers into the world of the chefs. I really like it. It highlights the sacrifices the chefs have to make to be on this show, and makes the whole competition feel that much more real and the stakes that much higher.
• WHAT?!? DAISY DUKES?!?! WHY?!? WHY ARE YOU CUTTING THEM WHILE YOU’RE WEARING THEM?!?! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING. WHY ARE THE PRODUCERS LETTING THIS HAPPEN
• This is teleporting me back to the shaved head incident from season 1.
• Bacon milk? Who’s out here milking bacon? Someone call PETA.
• What is this cooking lamp thing? It’s freaking me out
• Justin is half-Indian, whole-idiot.
• Justin was not bullied enough through middle school and high school, and it shows. Society should have never let these booty shorts happen on him.
• Justin is a horse confirmed? (This is way too many bullet points about Justin; it is becoming right on the verge of cyber-bullying)
• NO STEAM-GATE 🚨🚨🚨
• Genuinely, what do you do in this situation though? The ovens are supposed to be pre-heated before the chefs start cooking, so it’s obvious that Brittany thought the steamer would be on already when she put in her food. But clearly it wasn’t on, whether that was an oversight or technical restriction (I have no idea how a steamer works, but maybe it can’t be turned on before it’s used for some reason) so it doesn’t really feel like this flub is the fault of Brittany’s which makes it all the more tragic that her dish is essentially ruined because of it.
• Is it me or is the fashion off the charts this season? That’s not something I typically notice but every time somebody’s not in a chef’s coat (besides Justin’s ridiculous shorts) I’m like “damn that’s a sharp outfit”
• “Justin’s [dish] is a little lackluster” – That’s because Justin is lackluster.
• “Scallion Cream” sounds horrendous, I’m sorry. What is it, whipped cream with scallions in it? Eugh.
• Brittany PUSH!!!
• It feels insulting to be judged and then turn around and have to cook some more for some other nobodies that won’t affect your score at all.
• WHERE IS THE POT LICKER??? I see the fritter but WHERE’S THE POT LICKER
• Honestly, Tristan whispering “never admit that” when she was talking about her cooking woes really irked me. She had some disasters when creating her dish, and hiding them from the judges will only make them think that the dish she served was the way she intended to serve it, which is not at all the case. Plus, why lie to the judges? That will only make them mad at you trying and failing to lie to them, or them eventually figuring out you lied and they hold that against you. It’s just a bad idea all around, and makes me majorly cringe that Tristan implied that you should lie to them. The only thing I would have done differently from Brittany is being upfront that the cooking instrument that you thought was on was not on, but I feel like I remember in past seasons Tom responding to that with “why didn’t you double check then” which really just skirts around the whole issue of production supposed to be having those machines turned on and pre-heating already. This feels like a massive run-on sentence but I will not be editing it.
• There’s that frickin’ bacon cream again. Why are people making savory whipped creams? LEAVE IT ALONE!!!
• Is Duyen the new frontrunner???
• Duyen: “hmm. cool.” lol what a way to react to someone saying they thought their dish was great. She new he flopped
• Sieger looks like such a douchebag in every era. Every single one of his childhood photos, he looked like the quintessential douchebag of that decade lol Including this one! I might add
• There is nothing more cringe-y than somebody complimenting themselves on how they look.
• Fromager D’Affinois is the most pretentious sounding ingredient I’ve ever heard. And I’ve watched 23 seasons of Top Chef.
• At this point in the episode I made a note that I was literally falling asleep as I watched, so the quality of the remaining reactions may falter. I don’t know if they’ll get shorter or exponentially more unhinged. Let’s find out together.
• Pause for the Voss glamour shot. Not in any way distracting from the episode flow at all.
• Kinda peeved that the okra gamble paid off. But that feels like a personal grudge.
• SHE ONLY HAD TWENTY MINUTES TO COMPLETELY REINVENT AND RECOOK HER ENTIRE DISH!!! STOP BLAMING BRITTANY FOR THIS!!! “Didn’t know how to pivot” my ass
• oh no :( poor brittany
• I feel like she could do really well in Last Chance Kitchen. She can build her confidence there.

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